'How it is like to be with a Warrior!
How it is like to be the love of a Warrior!
His love comes with a demand of being his second priority...
His care comes with a demand of being alone when needed...
His pampering comes with consequences...
His calls come for seconds...
His hug come with a demand of months separation...
His presence comes with a demand of sending him off with smile...'
#Writer_Touch The news didn't hit me as hard as the thunder. It didn't cross me too as light as the rain droplets. I mourned with the nation, I prayed with the people, for the supreme sacrifice and to give strength to his family and friends. I felt heavy for hours and day passed. But when.....
Days back I read her words in social media, the girl who had been with him for eight years as a friend, as girlfriend, as gonna and wanna be wife, as light to erase darkness and as smile to vanish tension when he lands on her shoulders, my heart drowned in emotional flow. A beautiful part of his life left invisible, even without having the luxury of having his surname. All she has, the sung melodies, the broken promises, the laughed jokes, the warmth of his hug, the memory of fights and the smell of him. When the entire nation forgets him after a day, everytime when there is a knock on the door, she opens with the excitement of receiving him though she knows he is far somewhere, where she cant reach him. When we give a hard sigh and start the next day, she closes her eyes tightly and prays that everything should be dream though she knows his name is added in the war memorial. When the newspapers do not have enough space for his story, her life without him is as empty as his uniform without him.
Her words caged me with guilt. Her expression made me ponder over his image I saw, her narration crushed my veins and her loss asked me to answer. Her days with him requested me to call her as his lady though they haven't officially married, what else I need to consider her as his best-half than her togetherness with him in all his ups and downs from selection to training to duty in valley.
How it is like to be with a warrior. How it is like to be the invisible love of a man in uniform. When he goes for ops with his men, fighting battle of loneliness with fear is her chosen option. When he is in no network area, bribing all the gods to bring a single bar in his signal is her routine.
When his whereabouts is classified, sniffing everything to assume his workplace, sitting in front of TV screen to assure he is safe, regretting for the missed- calls, waking up late night by believing anytime he may dial, dreaming for his arrival, being silent when feeling of solitude assaults, smiling big for the notification that he received the text, diverting the mind in all activities yet fails, every second he and his face flash before eyes, confused with words, longing for a hold, expecting him to talk about his leave, trying all ways to send him something though the address is not available even in google, writing letters without postal address, counting the word soon as it's the only reply from him, consoling self to walk with pride, getting emotional while seeing the National Flag every time, skipping a beat in heart when ever there is a news on martyrdom, clearing the chaos with his memories, believing his promises of returning back, chasing her dreams with his motivation, eating his favourite food, recording his calls without his knowledge to afford to listen him often, and live life little ordinary as her man is extraordinary, are her daily chore.
Whom to call, who can inform, anybody know my existence in his life, the thoughts which scratch every cell of her body. Being a lady wife is difficult, indeed, at least in that combat you will have companions to back you up, but here she needs to stand alone, amid all debates and discussions of her single status, to fight her battle, at times additional sub-battles with her family too.
All she know is, it's worth fighting for as he is the one who can make her soar with wings, the one who can sing for her in midnight without hesitation, who can stand under devil rain to talk to her, who can climb up to get even a bit signal to dial her, who can smile for her stupid stories, who can listen her without frowning, who can understand her emotion and can make her stable, who can ring her just to listen her voice even amid umpteen schedule, who can ask her to be happy even without him, who can insist her to go for shopping and have fun without him, who can teach her survival strategies to protect her when he is away, who can suggest her the attire and anything he feels, who can make her feeling together even distance is state borders, who can send his phone to signal area just to receive her picture, who can hide his possessiveness which is pathetically palpable, who can believe her than himself, who can admire her for her idiotic deeds, who can earn her respect, who can pull her leg easily, who can make her pour tears as flood, who can love her to the core of the earth, who can bring blissfulness by a single wink, and who can ask her to wait till he returns.
Life is a fancy tale in uniform, no doubt, but the cost is bigger than the days of a year. When he is in bunker, she sits in darkness. When he guards the frontier, she settles her life to live for his arrival. When he instructs his men, she answers for the question of being a spinster. When he patrols, she takes care of herself well for him. When he presses trigger, she weeps her heart out to get him back soon.
What is like to be the love of a warrior...having the sun but cant afford to own it, seeing the moon but cant afford to possess it, breathing the air but cant afford to touch it and swimming the ocean without knowing the shore.
When his battles is in the field, her combat spins around the four walls. When his ops need a him, her day quivers for him. Without expectation, with the only expectation of his arrival, she passes her seconds which seems to be eras.
How it is like to be with a warrior. It's always like..... learn to live without him. Which is the nightmare of every lady who vows to be with the warriors. The fear of being only an invisible part in his life is the worst of all thread she handles.
Courage is a tiny word comparing with their character. Invincible is invalid comparing with their smile.
So its not just a soldier who sacrifices but there is a lady who gives up on herself along with him for the Nation.
#Writer_Touch, I, as a writer can penetrate into their emotional trauma unseen, I believe so. Sacrificing one self is less difficult than the life needs to be led without the person who is considered as everything.
Dedicated to all the #Fauji_girls who are the reasons behind the hard stomping of every boot.
Dedicated to all #the_warriors who are the reasons behind the pride walk of every heels.